A lesson from Lucy

My little puppy Lucy is an endless source of entertainment. Recently she has discovered her tail. She hasn't fully come to terms with the fact that it is a part of her, so she engages in a dance of spinning round and round trying to catch her own tail. She growls, bares her sharp white teeth and twirls like the Tasmanian devil. When she does this I fall into fits of hysterical laughter. Her disconnect tickles me to pieces! 

The other day I came up for air long enough to attempt to show her she was one whole piece and that she didn't have to run herself crazy chasing her own tail. She abruptly stopped, and turned to look right at me with eyes that said, 'HEY, I watch you do it all the time girlfriend. Take a good gander at yourself.' Relationships are useful in revealing what is not easily understood in yourself. Even if it is a relationship with one's dog.

But Lucy's right. I've recently come to an astonishing conclusion that college degrees won't make me whole. I've been collecting them for the past thirty years. I was just on the brink of enrolling into yet another when I paused. Like my dog chasing her tail, I'm running after something on the outside and completely missing the point that it is already so. My soul is being fed exactly what it needs at this moment. I'm finally comfortable enough in my own skin to stop, stand still, tune into the present moment, take a good look around at my life and be OK with where I'm at.

I believe for me, at this particular chapter in my life, that God is providing the space to learn exactly what I need. Each and every day I count my blessings that I get to practice and teach yoga. In addition, recently I've started interning as a counselor at Prototypes women's treatment center. One hour in that place teaches me more than any book I've read in the past two years, and I read a lot. I have my mother, my boyfriend, a book to publish, and a business to launch. There is a  lifetime of lessons to learn staring at me right in the face, a curriculum of teachable moments from the Divine to nurture and keep me growing.  

This is an adjustment on how I view life. I've put my enrollment in this latest masters program on ice which feels like I just parachuted out of an airplane and haven't pulled the rip cord yet. It is scary and exciting; flying purely on God' grace.

Meanwile, I'm praying for instructions to teach me how to land.